[Ryzif]

Disclaimer:

Tired after work and just pissed off in general. This isn't going to be a good post.


So to start this off because I'm really fucking pissed that I got pushed to this point, I'm resigning from PH Mod. 

I really enjoy the community, the people I've met and the experiences I've been through so I'm not leaving but I'm at this point where I can't bother to be on server anymore. Not as staff.  

Between my vicious hours at work, being ignored by the only person that can actually make changes to bring more fun to the server and my absolute desire to play something other than Gmod I just don't have it in me to continue. I've been motivated and happy to help out at every avenue I can but I can't even get an answer so that we can attempt to add stuff. We need different maps, different models, new content. I can't do anything when I can't even get an answer back on a near two month old app. This neglect has killed my motivation to keep playing and keep trying. I have far and few free time and the thought of giving it to PH when I can't even progress past a message back bothers the shit out of me. I had the drive and I could make the time but I'm not going to continue knowing I won't ever get anywhere. If I don't have the drive to make changes or get on anymore due to all this wasted time then how can I effectively be a staff member for PH? It's just not going to happen anymore. I've been thinking about this for the last few weeks but as every day drags on I just get more and more frustrated. My hands are tied and I can only do so much. I just don't have the energy to continue offering up my time for the server.

Regardless of all the trolls, the hackers, the racists and hell the racist hacking trolls who post unspeakable things that get blocked, I will say it's been an experience to say the least. I'm not regretful of giving up this time to help the community out I'm just absolutely fucking pissed that I got pushed to such a point where I have no more drive left for something I really enjoyed playing over the past year. I really don't like leaving the staff team in the place where it is as we need more higher staff but I can't be a part of it anymore. I only wish the staff team luck in doing a good job as they have been doing. I also had a very specific term for applying for Admin and considering that Chelllman has stepped down, I feel it's only fair if I do what I'd like to do as well. I need to resign from this part of staff also because if I don't have the energy to play then I'll just be inactive. I don't really want to be another inactive Mod.

I ABSOLUTELY appreciate the friends I've made because it certainly has made a positive impact in my life despite being an online community. There are so many that have helped me along the way both staff and regulars that have provided me with guidance and a fun experience. I would call them out but I don't think I have the energy to type out something so lengthy. This is already way past the point. 

Point being, PH Bread Mod is done. I will remain Discord Staff and help out when I can but I refuse to do anything with PH regarding staffing going forward. 

Peace out and I'll be around for sure.