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My Defense
#11
(04-13-2024, 12:09 AM)GooseFraba Wrote: Imagine having a mini meltdown and now everyone has to be implicated in member'berries. 
We are supposed to be a community who builds each other, not finger pointers who need to totem pole their actions to get attention
jammin you a good man and i dont believe you have to make an essay over a sentence you said out of context.
It is jammin, he DOES have to make an essay.
[Image: image.png]Don't take anything I say seriously
#12
ima be real after it was handled none of this crap shoulda been brought up
i love yall but sometimes you dudes just go digging for shit for no reason

edit: nah nvm this is a whole other level of screwed up now
#13
I'm going to form a union for dinks so nobody can get in trouble. You all owe me union dues costing $10 per person.
[Image: b_560x95.png]
#14
"For the record, I have requested a transparent investigation by the admin team be conducted into my past conduct" - Jammin 2024
cops looking into themselves is biased. Admins looking into pedophila is biased too apparently.
// this specifically referes to slide 12 "Jammin asked whether Ashly had been given the chance to defend herself, in the same way that Chief was. Hearing this was not given, Jammin contacted Ashly regarding the ban, since he was interacting with Ashly during this time period"
// This reads to me as no matter what I could have said they still would have believed chief even if he lied. It seems at this point I had no chance to redeem myself to the admins. They already put their thumbs down.

Left me first adress the external dropbox link found here: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/7mxkuqh1n...71qve&dl=0
This is every discord message between me, chief, jammin, nuru, and bryan. I will not lie to you like the "upper echolone" (also expect many spelling mistakes im not spellchecking shit)
My opinions and what the messages mean are in code comments at the bottom of the page and sometimes throughout.

I want to immedieatly adress that I was 14 exactly when chief started sending sexual messages to me. I honestly think this should have been easilt deducted when i told jammin the "victim" was 14. But I digress because clearly wording needs to be more specific than a thesuarus.
"It appeared at that early state of the investigation that there was no jurisdiction for Dink admins to get involved, as it involved two private people - an inactive staff member, and Ashly's friend who isn't in the community - and nothing was taking place on Dinkleberg servers"
Aswell as this, does this really mean that since chief only played 3 times a year instead of four that doesn't count? If he had messaged a 14 year old boy who never played on gmod it wouldn't count even with proof because said boy never played a game? Isn't that then allowing a pedophile the ability to continue the outreach of what you don't know?
My life has gotten better, really it started when i stopped having e-sex with people older than me but dinks decided not so. Since this has continued to damage my reputation outside of this community I'm making this statement public to everyone who was lied to about who i was.

I first joined discord in 2018 for a youtubers gacha life server. I was 12 when I was first approached by someone who claimed they were younger than me and thought my oc was cute.
Through that I started dating them, and they made me feel happy and better than all the time ever spent with my mother and limited family. I never realized until years later she was never the same age as me.
But all the way through until chief I dated older adults and even when they became honest with me I couldn't say no. I didn't know how to. But with chief I NEVER dated chief and you can see in our messages that he even said he wouldn't date me as a minor.
Yet for some reason and somehow the conclusion was made that I was dating him as an adult, cosplaying as jailbait, then blackmailing him into silence. Which reading by the way is the most wild shit I ever have seen. How the hell did you guys delude yourselfs with that?
Maybe it was because apparently you gave chief a whole ass "Hearing" about his side of the story where I was presented with 4 unseeming questions from jammin. Had I genuienly known that was my final chance to tell the admins "Hey idiots! Where the hell didd you get this story?" I would have.
But as you will see through me and chief's dms there is no blackmail, there was never evidence of blackmail. What I assume they mean is that I lied to the admins to avoid getting banned myself. This is not true, and it being called blackmail is disrespectful.
I ommited my name because I was disgusted by my actions, the weight of all those years exposing myself to random men online because i needed attention was hard hitting. I had to debate with myself for hours about bringing this up to dinks staff. This was meant to be a new leaf for me. Redeeming my life as it should have been.
Instead I recived the biggest hitting piece of depression ever by being told I was banned from the community (except the test server for some reason). But I didn't understand, even now I'm pretty sure I was banned out of hatred. Even with jammins slideshow timeline, it reads like they just started making the most jojo's bizzar accusations.
Which I did get better even after being banned. I recived a job and now make my own money, I have suceeded in art somewhat, and am now living a some what happy life. My ban from this community still weighs heavily on my mind and I hope this post brings me closure and peace knowing that now if they still believe that i fucking blackmailed chief I can call them all morons and smooth brains.

Another thing to adress since some of you still don't get it and still disrespect me in this community let me say it again.
In light of 15-16 I started having my full on gender crisis. Starting to find myself that I was [transgender] and I know some of you to this day still that I changed my usernames to hide myself from contraversy and warnings.
I changed my name from my perminate one that you know as "Milly-Dilly" to Ashly because that was the name that I felt comfortable in at the time. Even when some people started realizing this every apology felt disingenuine and made out of panick that Iwould lash out on them. (yes there is a specific person in the second part)
This also helpped me realize how ruined my life was pedophila and I needed to move on from it. I made sure chief was the last adult to ever talk to me in a sexual way. I got better and I learned how to move on. So fuck you for thinking I was never going to change or that i was going to "repeat behaviour".
Also another reason as to how me and chief NEVER dated (aside from him having sex from his brother which im sure he didn't share to you). Was finding out I was truely lesbian and I had completely stopped liking men all together. While i do thank reina for helping me futher accept being [transgender] and lesbian she was still a horrible person to have said i was "proud of these actions"
If she thinks in anyway this little jab at jammin somehow obstains her from how she also treated me after the "news broke". That's absolutely self centered, the fact she decided to being this back up at all pisses me off almost as much as the community telling me its my fault i got groomed. (thanks for that assholes!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Nuru also confirmed I was a minor fish so fuck you too, I know you hated me but to go that far? What the hell, dude. As if I didn't want to prematurely end my life the first time reading this shit surely has made me want to again. My mother even said to me when i turned 18 "I thought you would have killed yourself by now.".
With that my name is Melodine or Deer, and my pronouns are she/her. and I do immensiley respect jammin for using Ashly throughout the slideshow and not milly.


To this day I don't think i should be banned still, especially if the train of thought was "adult jailbaits, then blackmails uncomftorbal adult".
rebringing up this whole situation was incompitent from reina. I shouldn't even need to defend myself, I was the minor trying to redeem my whole life just to be kicked in the non-exsistant balls.
I know you won't unban me reguardless which dissapoints me, unable to find another good set of servers is immpossible but i stopped looking long ago after I lost every piece of motivation I had for creativity in gmod.
But I don't maybe consider at least to temporarily unban me for mothers day or something so I can at least play one more time. you know since I just had to relive probably one of the worst moments in my life.
In which I want to add that I never alted, This will be my one and only alt to this server. Even the discord alt I had in dinks Austin Powers I immidetly reported to jammin.

TL:DR FOR RAND (this is in response to his meme)
dropbox links to every message from jammin, chief, and nuru. Bryans messages are there too, but don't really matter its just example.
I lied to jammin about being the victim because I was disgusted with myself of my actions
I had my first pedophile interaction when I was 12 which caused me to get addicted to edating
My name is Melodine, nice to meet you again.
I don't think I should have been banned tbh, reading all this new information makes me think I'm dreaming.
and no ill will to anyone really, if i need to move on fully from here I need to forgive. I made many mistakes and this is the bullet I assume i needed to bite.
#15
great job guys, we made someone’s trauma resurface to entertain the thirst for drama. I hope it was worth it you degenerates.
#16
(04-13-2024, 08:48 AM)whecheweer Wrote: TL:DR FOR RAND (this is in response to his meme)
modest mouse is a really good band (this is not a shitpost)

I'm sorry you had to go through all that, just to go through more due to...honestly, from this new perspective, incompetence from all sides. And then go through it again because of more of the same. If there's definitive proof of age, since it's unfortunately very relevant, (admins reach out to nuru or just reverify), unban plsty 


ok back to bed good to see u melodine
[Image: TWQlDjL.png] 
-courtesy of a sarcastic fish

[Image: t2X0SiD.png]
-courtesy of milk(2)
#17
I can't really bring myself to read the dms with chief because yuck, but this situation is actually horrible. I'm honestly left speechless... All i can say is that I'm sorry i took your ban at face value and I'm saddened you had to relive some of the worst moments in your life Melodine.
[Image: e2d.jpg]
#18
The Melodine-Chief situation occurred before my tenure as admin, and while I did see the evidence that all current admins have access to (when I was admin and had access to it), it's been well over a year and I'm not going to trust my memory at all to make any comments on how the previous admins investigated/debated about the situation.

I would ask that the web staff police this thread heavily. This is a very serious situation being discussed and there is absolutely no place for shitposting or insults (which may be posted in the future). Everyone should be approaching this thread with the decorum it deserves. Jammin has the right to respond to what Reina said in her resignation. I also believe that Melodine has the right to be heard as well. Whether or not other former admins directly involved in the decision of community bans for Melodine and Chief decide to join the discussion is unknown, but I would advise anyone responding to attempt to approach this situation as objectively as possible.
[Image: ZN1HpFb.png]
#19
(04-13-2024, 08:48 AM)whecheweer Wrote: "For the record, I have requested a transparent investigation by the admin team be conducted into my past conduct" - Jammin 2024
cops looking into themselves is biased. Admins looking into pedophila is biased too apparently.
// this specifically referes to slide 12 "Jammin asked whether Ashly had been given the chance to defend herself, in the same way that Chief was. Hearing this was not given, Jammin contacted Ashly regarding the ban, since he was interacting with Ashly during this time period"
// This reads to me as no matter what I could have said they still would have believed chief even if he lied. It seems at this point I had no chance to redeem myself to the admins. They already put their thumbs down.

Left me first adress the external dropbox link found here: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/7mxkuqh1n...71qve&dl=0
This is every discord message between me, chief, jammin, nuru, and bryan. I will not lie to you like the "upper echolone" (also expect many spelling mistakes im not spellchecking shit)
My opinions and what the messages mean are in code comments at the bottom of the page and sometimes throughout.

I want to immedieatly adress that I was 14 exactly when chief started sending sexual messages to me. I honestly think this should have been easilt deducted when i told jammin the "victim" was 14. But I digress because clearly wording needs to be more specific than a thesuarus.
"It appeared at that early state of the investigation that there was no jurisdiction for Dink admins to get involved, as it involved two private people - an inactive staff member, and Ashly's friend who isn't in the community - and nothing was taking place on Dinkleberg servers"
Aswell as this, does this really mean that since chief only played 3 times a year instead of four that doesn't count? If he had messaged a 14 year old boy who never played on gmod it wouldn't count even with proof because said boy never played a game? Isn't that then allowing a pedophile the ability to continue the outreach of what you don't know?
My life has gotten better, really it started when i stopped having e-sex with people older than me but dinks decided not so. Since this has continued to damage my reputation outside of this community I'm making this statement public to everyone who was lied to about who i was.

I first joined discord in 2018 for a youtubers gacha life server. I was 12 when I was first approached by someone who claimed they were younger than me and thought my oc was cute.
Through that I started dating them, and they made me feel happy and better than all the time ever spent with my mother and limited family. I never realized until years later she was never the same age as me.
But all the way through until chief I dated older adults and even when they became honest with me I couldn't say no. I didn't know how to. But with chief I NEVER dated chief and you can see in our messages that he even said he wouldn't date me as a minor.
Yet for some reason and somehow the conclusion was made that I was dating him as an adult, cosplaying as jailbait, then blackmailing him into silence. Which reading by the way is the most wild shit I ever have seen. How the hell did you guys delude yourselfs with that?
Maybe it was because apparently you gave chief a whole ass "Hearing" about his side of the story where I was presented with 4 unseeming questions from jammin. Had I genuienly known that was my final chance to tell the admins "Hey idiots! Where the hell didd you get this story?" I would have.
But as you will see through me and chief's dms there is no blackmail, there was never evidence of blackmail. What I assume they mean is that I lied to the admins to avoid getting banned myself. This is not true, and it being called blackmail is disrespectful.
I ommited my name because I was disgusted by my actions, the weight of all those years exposing myself to random men online because i needed attention was hard hitting. I had to debate with myself for hours about bringing this up to dinks staff. This was meant to be a new leaf for me. Redeeming my life as it should have been.
Instead I recived the biggest hitting piece of depression ever by being told I was banned from the community (except the test server for some reason). But I didn't understand, even now I'm pretty sure I was banned out of hatred. Even with jammins slideshow timeline, it reads like they just started making the most jojo's bizzar accusations.
Which I did get better even after being banned. I recived a job and now make my own money, I have suceeded in art somewhat, and am now living a some what happy life. My ban from this community still weighs heavily on my mind and I hope this post brings me closure and peace knowing that now if they still believe that i fucking blackmailed chief I can call them all morons and smooth brains.

Another thing to adress since some of you still don't get it and still disrespect me in this community let me say it again.
In light of 15-16 I started having my full on gender crisis. Starting to find myself that I was [transgender] and I know some of you to this day still that I changed my usernames to hide myself from contraversy and warnings.
I changed my name from my perminate one that you know as "Milly-Dilly" to Ashly because that was the name that I felt comfortable in at the time. Even when some people started realizing this every apology felt disingenuine and made out of panick that Iwould lash out on them. (yes there is a specific person in the second part)
This also helpped me realize how ruined my life was pedophila and I needed to move on from it. I made sure chief was the last adult to ever talk to me in a sexual way. I got better and I learned how to move on. So fuck you for thinking I was never going to change or that i was going to "repeat behaviour".
Also another reason as to how me and chief NEVER dated (aside from him having sex from his brother which im sure he didn't share to you). Was finding out I was truely lesbian and I had completely stopped liking men all together. While i do thank reina for helping me futher accept being [transgender] and lesbian she was still a horrible person to have said i was "proud of these actions"
If she thinks in anyway this little jab at jammin somehow obstains her from how she also treated me after the "news broke". That's absolutely self centered, the fact she decided to being this back up at all pisses me off almost as much as the community telling me its my fault i got groomed. (thanks for that assholes!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Nuru also confirmed I was a minor fish so fuck you too, I know you hated me but to go that far? What the hell, dude. As if I didn't want to prematurely end my life the first time reading this shit surely has made me want to again. My mother even said to me when i turned 18 "I thought you would have killed yourself by now.".
With that my name is Melodine or Deer, and my pronouns are she/her. and I do immensiley respect jammin for using Ashly throughout the slideshow and not milly.


To this day I don't think i should be banned still, especially if the train of thought was "adult jailbaits, then blackmails uncomftorbal adult".
rebringing up this whole situation was incompitent from reina. I shouldn't even need to defend myself, I was the minor trying to redeem my whole life just to be kicked in the non-exsistant balls.
I know you won't unban me reguardless which dissapoints me, unable to find another good set of servers is immpossible but i stopped looking long ago after I lost every piece of motivation I had for creativity in gmod.
But I don't maybe consider at least to temporarily unban me for mothers day or something so I can at least play one more time. you know since I just had to relive probably one of the worst moments in my life.
In which I want to add that I never alted, This will be my one and only alt to this server. Even the discord alt I had in dinks Austin Powers I immidetly reported to jammin.

TL:DR FOR RAND (this is in response to his meme)
dropbox links to every message from jammin, chief, and nuru. Bryans messages are there too, but don't really matter its just example.
I lied to jammin about being the victim because I was disgusted with myself of my actions
I had my first pedophile interaction when I was 12 which caused me to get addicted to edating
My name is Melodine, nice to meet you again.
I don't think I should have been banned tbh, reading all this new information makes me think I'm dreaming.
and no ill will to anyone really, if i need to move on fully from here I need to forgive. I made many mistakes and this is the bullet I assume i needed to bite.

i'm genuinely proud of you for having the strength to come forward with all of this, melodine. i'm sorry it took 2 years for you to be able to clear your name, and i'm sorry that the community (myself included) took the admin's words at face value. i apologize for causing you to have to defend yourself, that was not my intention at all, but thank you for speaking up and possibly preventing situations like your own from being mishandled like this in the future.

(04-13-2024, 09:12 AM)chapman Wrote: great job guys, we made someone’s trauma resurface to entertain the thirst for drama. I hope it was worth it you degenerates.
those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it. this wasn't "entertaining the thirst for drama", it was bringing attention to a situation that had been grossly mishandled.
#20
i guess i didn't read the same dropbox you did...
[Image: 76561198079899620.png]
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